Yep, our generation didn’t have it easy. We were at work on time and went home by the next sunrise. We sweated over every single ad that came out, be it a full campaign or the smallest ear ad or flyer. There was no such thing as a “just get it over and done with” kind of ad, the one that you let go knowing there’s no award waiting at the end of it. Each piece had to come out as decent as possible bearing in mind that no matter what happens to it, your name and your company’s reputation are at stake. There were no short cuts, no instant way to fame. We relished the victories that were so much sweeter, so much more fulfilling because we earned them through hard work and with our integrity intact.

But don’t get me wrong, I’m not passing judgment on any young individual trying to find his/her place in the workforce. Maybe, it’s just a matter of changing priorities and the myriad of choices that seem to be more available now. Young workers jump from one job to the next until they find the best one for them. And it might not be the highest paying job, it could be the least painful, the one that with the more flexible schedule, the one with more travel opportunities, or whichever can quickly bring them closer to the fulfillment they seek. Maybe they’re really much wiser and I might just be an old-fashioned fool. Still, I believe unless you’re terribly lucky, you have to pay your dues before you can enjoy any amount of success. Or maybe I’m simply growing old.

“The truth hurts” is a phrase that I would think, is not so true when we are concerned: The truth doesn’t hurt that much. Well, I speak for myself and all the Filipinos I personally know and know well. When we’re accused of something that’s true, we feel embarrassed, but we accept it, and then we can actually laugh and joke about it. But when accused falsely, that’s when we really get hurt, our personal integrity is being questioned. And when you’re from a poor country lacking in material riches, your principles and beliefs, and all the intangibles that make up who you are like dedication, strength of character and a clean conscience, these are the things that keep your head up high.

I think this issue is more than about our national pride getting a beating. It gets personal as almost every Pinoy would have a friend or relative who is in the medical field and an OFW (myself included), and we all know of the sacrifices they have to make for the sake of their families. We also know that they are valued abroad, not only for their hard work but also for their competence and compassionate nature.Apologies have been sent out. Some say it’s not enough. But knowing how we are, we’ll forgive and forget, like how we seemed to have collectively forgotten about the Marcoses.

Anyway, things like these remind me of the animated feature Bambi, where Bambi was being told by Mum (or was it Thumper),”If you have nothing good to say, don’t say anything at all.” There you have it. Straight from the mouth of an all- American baby deer.

That was the thought running in my head while my partner and I got involved in a charity project for hospice care. We spent several weeks talking to patients and their families, caregivers, nurses and hospice staff. It was emotionally draining to say the least (in a way, it dampened my happy birthday mood). Although, death is not an alien concept in my family, having a few loved ones who had passed on, I still can’t help being affected by the reality that surrounded me. Death looming on every bed. Casting it’s shadow on an old man abandoned by his family. Playing hide and seek with a 3-year-old girl who’s just learning to play with other children like her. Yes there were children and old folks, and people my age. All with terminal illness and given a prognosis of 6 months or less. Yet in spite of their condition, they manage to laugh and find joy in the littlest of things. You’d think in a place where futures are measured in mere months, hope is the last thing you’ll find. But no. We found it in the patients whose faces light up when we take their pictures, in the caregivers and nurses who speak with so much love for what they do and the people they care for.

And here we are, most of the time, consumed by work and bills. Thinking our work is the most important job and the world. Defining our lives by the amount of recognition we receive. Pursuing happiness with every swipe of our credit cards. (And starting each sentence with a participle. Intense emotions really do things to my brain…)

An exercise like this truly gives one a different perspective. What it also does is prepare yourself for that final journey. For me, it’s like being told, don’t hold back. Do everything you can today for others and for yourself too. Do it like it’s the last chance you’ve got because you never know.

They’re cute as ever but my goodness, how they’ve grown!

Aww, I miss them. Wonder when can we sneak another trip back to Manila?

This may sound like a “thank you” speech, but please bear with me and I’ll be off: Thanks to Lilit, Mela, Cey, Owie, who were actually the ones who took care of my entry — checking grammar, getting it printed out, notarised and sent out just hours before the deadline. I literally wouldn’t have made it without them!

And thanks for everyone’s messages! Here’s the story. It’s also up there in the tabs, “Junior”. Hope you guys like it.

This one is for Rhuena and Kim. For Irene and Alexis. For every single mom (or dad) who fills a child’s world with love.

And for Mama.

I heard it said that leaving, whether you are the one going or being left behind, is like a little death. Maybe because the life and routine you’ve known simply come to a full stop. No more laughing at secret jokes, no more crazy coded conversations, no more angst exchanges over lunch and coffee. No more of that reassuring feeling you get when you know that no matter what happens you’ve got that true friend you can run to, even for the most mundane things like an occasional dollar or 2 for coffee. (Yes, she’s our ATM, Anna Testa Moneymachine.)

Anna flew to London Saturday night. I’m actually happy for her. Mike and I know for sure, she’ll do extremely well there like she did here. Still we will miss her terribly. It’s always good to have someone who puts things in the proper perspective when you lose your way and look after you like a big sister. I miss her now. I cried when we said good-bye, I can’t help it. And it didn’t help that in the cab we rode on the way home, the song “That’s What Friends Are For” played like a background music to our sullen mood.

Enough of that. No goodbyes. We’ll see her again! In London. In Toronto. In outer space. Wherever it is, I’m so looking forward to that day!

We saw him off tonight and can’t help feel lost again. Singapore won’t be the same without him but a great guy like him deserves better.

See you, Mike. Though you said, this is not goodbye, we’ll still miss you terribly. We’re also looking forward to building that scooter shop beside your bike shop, Mike & Mike’s. Can’t wait!

1. ABBA’s “Dancing Queen” & “Mama Mia”
2. Ugly Betty and its Spanish predecessor “Betty La Fea”
3. Beyonce’s “Crazy In Love” video
4. Fifth Dimension’s “If I Could Reach You”
5. Tom Jones’ “It’s Not Unusual”
6. Melissa Manchester “Don’t Cry Out Loud”
7. Harry Belafonte’s songs
8. The Sound of Music, movie and soundtrack
9. Star Trek
10. Smallville
11. Journey’s “Faithfully”
12. CHiPs, yep, with Erik Estrada
13. Six Million Dollar Man
14. Knots Landing
15. Helen Reddy’s “You and Me Against the World”
16. Nelson’s “Love and Affection”
17. The Association’s “Never My Love”
18. Elvis Presley’s “Suspicious Minds”
19. Tour of Duty
20. Foster’s Home For Imaginary Friends
21. The New Schmoo
22. Priscilla Queen of the Desert
23. 7th Heaven
24. Wacky Races
25. Outkast’s “Hey Ya”
26. Falcon Crest
27. Misfits of Science
28. The A-Team
29. E News
30. Cat Stevens’ “Father & Son”

I can’t help it. I grew up on most of them and some I love for sentimental reasons. Not Beyonce, of course. Although thinking about how I could never have a body like hers make me want to cry.

I danced my crazy dances with Papa while Harry Belafonte Banana Boat Song played on our turntable. And I always felt “Don’t Cry Out Loud”, like “You and Me Against the World”, was a song about Mama and me though I hardly understood the lyrics. I sang “If I Could Reach You” in my head for a boy I had a big love for. While The Sound of Music was the first movie I ever saw (and I’ve seen it at least a hundred times after). Star Trek is a peek into my geekhood, while Ugly Betty is a good reason to block off my Sunday nights. The rest, hard to admit, but yes, I love them, Tom Jones included. My list can go on and on but I have to run. Another guilty pleasure awaits – a pint of Ben & Jerry’s Marsha Marsha Marshmallow.

I had planned to leave my college with a degree in tow but I instead I went AWOL and started working before graduation.

I had planned to follow after my aunt’s footsteps and become a lawyer but I ended up in advertising.

I had planned to shift careers but more than a decade later, I am still in the same job.

I had planned to share many years with loved ones but they passed on earlier than expected.

Am I disappointed that none of my so-called plans have been fulfilled? Not entirely.

I always believe that things turn out a certain way for a reason. While some are borne of my own decisions, others, well, it’s life taking over. For those times that my mind can’t comprehend, I can only pray to my Lord. “Grant me the serenity to accept the things I can’t change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”

Most things in my life have not turned out the way I wanted them to. They actually turned out better.